5 Things to do when someone tells you "you won't succeed"
What's the first thing that happens when you come up with an amazing idea and you want to share it?
Fear of them saying that it's not a good idea or worse that you can't actually do it.
But let's say you're so confident in that, that you're not worried about it.
And then they do say it. "You won't be able to succeed doing that on your own."
This happened to me recently. I've been really lucky that my friends and family are supportive of my entrepreneurial spirit, but it's inevitable that someone is going to tell you right to your face that you can't succeed on your own. It didn't necessarily come out of nowhere, but it still stung a bit, I'm not going to lie.
This is something that we come across our entire lives. Maybe it happened to you as a child and it stuck with you throughout adulthood. Maybe you raised your hand in class with what you thought was a great idea and instead of applause, the class burst out laughing. Then, later on in life, you're in a work meeting, have a great solution, but you're too scared to speak up. These tiny situations really do impact our actions for the rest of our lives.
The good thing is though that we can overcome it when we identify it. Come face to face with it. And know that it isn't the reality of who you really are.
Here are my 5 things to do the next time someone tells you, you can't.
- Don't take it personally. Yes, it's going to sting, but you know that they can't define what you can and can't do. When people try to bring others down or limit what they can do, they're doing it because they are reflecting that feeling about themselves. They're seeing your potential and that you're taking action, which is something that they may have thought is something they can't do. They've conditioned themselves into thinking that they can't do something and therefore have conditioned themselves to think that you can't either.
- Get back into your high vibes. Make a list wherever you are, whether it's on your phone or a napkin of all the reasons why you're going to succeed.
- Don't get defensive. You're probably going to want to put on the imaginary boxing gloves and get defensive, but try to avoid this. It's not your job to convince this person why. They don't hold the key to your success. You don't have to prove to them anything.
- Know your audience. If someone you know has been unsupportive in the past, and they ask you how things are going, don't dive into the details. Just say things are going well and move onto the next subject. Chances are that they'll try to talk you out of it again and it's not worth putting yourself through that. Be polite and talk about how it seems like everything these days is pumpkin spice flavored.
- Take one new step towards your goal. When you get home for the evening, do one thing no matter how big or how small that will make you feel like you're progressing. It could be as small as writing out an outline or you this could be that big push to launch it in front of friends and family on Facebook.
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